We can't be "regulated" in dysregulated systems

Let’s first start by defining what “regulation” is.

Regulation. /ˌrɛɡjʊˈleɪʃn/ - noun

Classical definition:  Rules made by a government or other authority in order to control the way something is done or the way people behave.

Biological definition: Biological regulation is what allows an organism to handle the effects of a perturbation, modulating its own constitutive dynamics in response to particular changes in internal and external conditions.

Nervous system regulation 

Nervous System Regulation is, at its core, the ability to move flexibly between different states of arousal in response to stressors. This means that when we encounter a change in our environment, like a stressful situation, we can adapt so that we are not overwhelmed.

First of all, all trauma is systemic.
And when we talk about trauma healing on an individual level, and use the word regulation for the client, how is it possible for an individual nervous system to achieve "regulation" when the larger system in which that individual system lives is oppressive and constantly out of whack?

I think it's really unfair that we're asked as individuals, and especially those of us who feel systemic oppression, to constantly "regulate" ourselves when the systems we live in are dysregulated.

If it's scientifically proven that a child lives in its parents' nervous system and is regulated or dysregulated when its parents are, then I see the same process happening between citizens and countries, the systems we live in. If the system is dysregulated, we'll be too, and it's up to the system to regulate itself so that we can get there easily.
 

While it's clear that the word "regulation" is problematic, the idea and intention behind it are not entirely so. What is meant by "regulation" is the use of various tools and methods (scientific, spiritual, cultural...) to EXPAND the nervous system. Thus, the practice of "regulation" simply expands our nervous system, our window of tolerance, so that we are able to take a bit of the dysregulation coming from the system in us and not be overwhelmed by it. 

As I believe that words have power,  with my clients, I explain clearly why I am not using the word “regulation” around nervous system work but rather the word EXPANSION. I also encourage them not to force to “self-regulate” as it can be hard to achieve especially if they did not experience enough Co-regulation with caregivers. They must rather engage the most possible in “Co-regulation” with friends and loved ones.

And while I love the concept of "co-regulation" and am a fervent advocate of it, I still don't feel entirely comfortable with it because of the term "regulation" that's part of it.

So here are the official words I'll be using in my work from now on.

Self-expansion instead of self-regulation 

Co-expansion instead of Co-regulation. 

Imagine the difference we can make in our client's lives if they learn that they are not "dysregulated" but that their nervous system is rather contracted because of what has happened and is happening in the system they live in.

Imagine the difference we can make if our clients don't feel guilty and ashamed of not being able to "regulate" in the face of social injustice, genocide, and all kinds of oppression.

In Western therapy and trauma work, our obsession with regulation can be rooted in colonial mentality.

We don't have to show that we're angry or overwhelmed because we're "civilized" beings.
But anger is sometimes necessary to remind the system that injustices have gone too far. Showing that we are overwhelmed will remind the system to regulate itself.